Updated: Oct 17, 2018
I have been diving deeply into my own healing and remembrance journey for a number of years now and documenting my discoveries along the way for my own purposes...with a subtle understanding that I may choose or be asked to share them in the future. I am hearing that invitation now. "It's time to share, Dear One," echo the whispers of my Guides...I listen intently making sure my hearing is Clear and un-muddled as the whispers grow in intensity.
What my experiences invoke and evoke in you will be unique to you and it is all welcomed. I invite you to allow it to move through you and release the energy that may have been held and stagnant for eons of time. Releasing it and feeling yourself in greater alignment and flow as a result. I write and share my experiences for me, for all of us. As a gifted friend has told me, "What you do for yourself, you do for the world." I will share my writings with the date they were written (or experienced), but I will not be sharing in any particular linear order. Why? Because we are moving out of this ancient illusion of linear time. I will share based on what I am guided to share. This is the new way. The way of intuitive movement and flow. Loving you, always.
January 10, 2017
I prayed for abundance and called on my guides, soul family of light and other beings of Divine Love and Truth who wished to aid me. My prayer was to be in abundant flow with Life’s resources, so that I am unlimited in all ways, with a particular focus on financial abundance so that I may be in Divine service to others and to myself.
The Spirit presence expressed delight to be of assistance and informed me that I have a few (which I felt to be 3 in particular) blockages (as in a block to the flow of energy) and this is where I must start. I was told to listen in each moment in every encounter with someone new or someone I know, that I may receive guidance towards my financial freedom. It was suggested that I exit the shower where I began this healing, and to sit in a meditative state and to document the experience right after. I promptly exited the shower and settled into meditation.
Upon dropping in, I was led through a grounding and energy flow exercise, which I do often. I circulated Source energy through my being, from my crown down through the central channel to the perineum and back around again. Creating a powerful toroidal field of energy through and around my body. Shortly after, I was guided to the first block (or perhaps more accurately: the first error in understanding. I was also told that I was doing a great deal of releasing for others-it is a collective healing-by addressing these errors in understanding, and that this will assist in the process of the release of funds to the world. As each person heals, so too does the collective. I felt a great deal of feminine wounding around this work. Spirit said the work around abundance and financial freedom is an important area for me to focus on at this time and there will be many spaces that I will bring this to the forefront.
Block 1: My heart…I felt chains around my heart. My heart space felt compressed, squeezed by these chains. I heard the pain and screams of women. This was an ancient wound of the Divine feminine. There was a deep feeling of limitation…the feminine has been in metaphorical and sometimes literal chains; limited, bound, enslaved. I sobbed deeply and released as I felt the collective pain so powerfully. After this release I was sitting silently and was guided to feel abundance as a state of Being. Abundance of Joy! Abundance of Love! Abundance of ~Energy.~ Money is energy. Energy is in endless, limitless supply. I repeated inside myself and sometimes aloud: “I am Unlimited. Limitless. I am Free. I am Free. Free Yourself.” “Stop punishing yourself,” Spirit had me repeat these words multiple times, opening something inside of me. I could feel how I limit and punish myself, as an internalization for the ways that I felt others…the patriarchy…has limited and punished all women including myself. I have not allowed myself to experience freedom in many senses, perhaps especially financial freedom, feeling like I don’t deserve that. I’ve been punishing myself. It has been a sadistic game I have participated in. At this point, I may be the only one left playing. Maybe no one else is asking me to remain small and limited, and if they are…then go to Hell!! HA!! I committed myself to releasing these old stories.
I felt maybe that was all for now. I do not need to rush the healing/clearing process. And after a few moments and resettling in to the experience, on we went to the next block.
Block 2: Fear. 3rd Chakra. I saw the way that I am fearful of buying, spending money and even giving to others. Terrified and panicky that I won’t have enough for myself/for my family if I do. This block/error in understanding is deeply rooted in ego. Greed was taking up residence here. Fear, perception of lack and greed feeding my ego in the space of my third chakra. Playing games to see who can be in power. I was shown how I can give to others (or myself) and to do so with absolute joy and love and without an ounce of fear. Give without expectation or judgment. I could feel what it feels like to give from my heart space; completely free of fear and with so much joy and trust that I am Divinely supported. And also…My guides said, “This does not mean you spend a large sum of money ($600 or something as an example) that you do not have to spend in the truth of that moment. It means that when you do choose to spend money as you are able, do it with joy and a sense of freedom as opposed to greed and with fear or a sense of lack.”
And breathing through it...breathing it in. Letting the new shifts in my being to settle and find their rhythm, while the old ways are shown the door.
Block 3: I could feel this one coming. My first chakra. Survival. This was a particularly sensory experience. I felt an incredible restriction of all my chakras, starting from my first chakra up, up, up to my heart and throat. I felt a disgusting darkness, primal, ancient energy, and Reptilian. I felt like I wanted to throw up. The energy was foul. I then felt a piercing pain under my chin (where my tongue lies in my throat, but on the outside). I investigated. Before going further I invoked my Will as this was very dark and I wanted to move forward without fear or being over powered by this energy. Spirit let me know that I am supported and that it was necessary to feel this experience without blocking it too much (through my will). This resonated as I could feel how I was blocking the experience by enforcing my will. While the use of Divine Will or Sacred Fire is especially vital when working with darker energies, in this moment too much “RAWR" or fire prevented my seeing what I was being shown. I was being asked to observe. A beautiful lesson on how to work with the fire element and Will. I was told that the piercing under my chin was an implant. I felt a chord go from under my chin to my first chakra. It felt like this chord synched all my chakras together, tightening them and effectively limiting their ability to function properly. The first step was to clear the implant. After this was done I could feel the release of tension in my mouth and jaw and in the space between my throat and first chakra. I took a deep breath. I felt the ease with which I was able to take this breath. I did not receive much information about what all this meant. I may never as it could be unnecessary. Without making too many assumptions, this felt like a very old, ancient implant that is perhaps in a great deal of humans. To burn off any remaining residue of this disgusting energy/implant I brought in the Violet fire. I felt how it flowed in abundance around and within me, happy to be of service. I continued to hear how money is energy and energy is in infinite supply. Therefore, so is money. I soaked in the beauty of the energy of Abundance.
I noticed how my guides invited me to begin this healing in the heart center and moved down through the solar plexus, then the first chakra. What is the significance of beginning in the heart? When the heart is open and clear, there is greater access to the energy centers in the rest of the body. It is said that all Dis-ease begins in the heart. So, when we wish to bring the physical and energetic bodies into greater alignment, the heart is a perfect place to start.